The Best Advice I Ever Received

If it’s not their fault, don’t blame them.

Let me explain.

Often times in life things go wrong, probably far more often than any of us would like. When things go wrong everyone reacts in their own individual way. Depending on how big the “thing” is that is going wrong dictates how we attempt to rectify the situation.

When I was in high school things would go wrong and because I didn’t know how to handle things yet, I always went straight to my dad. I went to my dad when my brand new iPod stopped working, I went to my dad when my debit card got declined even though I had sufficient funds, I went to my dad when I got sent to collections for a gym membership I had cancelled, etc. And during these conflicts, when all these things were going wrong, I watched my dad handle the situations with the attitude of if it’s not their fault, don’t blame them.

Never ok to be cruel

What this means is, the person you’re calling and speaking to, maybe it’s a Comcast representative or an AT&T representative – the issue you’re experiencing is probably not directly their fault. Sure, when AT&T added insurance to the wrong phone on my plan and then that phone broke and I couldn’t get a replacement it was most definitely AT&Ts fault. However, when I called support the nice guy that answered my call, it wasn’t his fault. See what I’m saying?

Watching my dad deal with Comcast and the gym that sent me to collections and Apple when my brand new iPod broke I learned the most valuable piece of wisdom, and I carry it with me to this day. It’s a bit like the saying “kill them with kindness”, don’t blame people for something they didn’t do and they’re far, far more likely to help you.

Start your conversation with a service representative like this: “Hi so-and-so, I am calling because xyz was messed up on my bill and it’s really important to me that this get rectified sooner rather than later. I realize that this isn’t you’re fault so I hope I don’t sound like I’m blaming you, I’m just hoping you can help to resolve this situation.”

And boom, you’d be amazed. Suddenly that person who has probably been yelled at and criticized all day long by people calling to complain about their bill feels a weight lifted because you’re treating them with kindness and respect. I promise you, they are more willing to go above and beyond to help you if you are nice. If it’s not their fault, don’t blame them.

Responsible

52 Books in 52 Weeks – CHECK

52 Books

2014 was the year of so. many. books.

And yes, I realize this post is very late considering I finished the last book on Christmas, but shhh. No telling.

Some were really good, some were really bad, most were pretty in between. I wrote about a few of the books in different posts, and this post specifically had a handful of them covered. I found basically what I expected, I still prefer the murder mysteries and sad/sob stories the best. I loved starting the Sue Grafton series A is for Alibi, B is for Burglar and having these easy, fun reads dispersed throughout my list was really, really helpful.

Because hey, reading a book a week for a year is freaking hard. I don’t understand people who can read like 100 books a year. Are they short stories? Comic books maybe? I mean 2014 wasn’t exactly the biggest, busiest year of my life and 52 was still super tough.

Anyways, back to the books I liked, I loved reading My Sisters Keeper, The Fault in our Stars, The Lovely Bones – so I like to have my heart broken by books is what that tells me. But I also enjoyed, and I guess you can take these as my recommendations, Shutter Island, Where’d You Go, Bernadette? LOVED THAT ONE, One for the Money, and The Minority Report. You can check out my list of books to see some of the ones I really didn’t like, I didn’t finish them all.

So, long story short… Reading a book a week is tough. But I did it. I accomplished one more thing on my list of 30 before 30. Now I’m back to reading for pleasure with no pressure to finish a book in a certain time period and it’s fabulous. If any of you are thinking of attempting the 52 books in 52 weeks challenge, I dare you – seriously, go for it. Then have a few months where you don’t want to read AT ALL. But one recommendation I have that helped me so, so much was picking the books and making a list ahead of time. If I had had to buy books every week or even just try to find a book I wanted to read there is no way I would have succeeded.

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